The Road Not Taken
Two roads diverged in a yellow wood,
And sorry I could not travel both
And be one traveler, long I stood
And looked down one as far as I could
To where it bent in the undergrowth;
Then took the other, as just as fair,
And having perhaps the better claim,
Because it was grassy and wanted wear;
Though as for that the passing there
Had worn them really about the same,
And both that morning equally lay
In leaves no step had trodden black.
Oh, I kept the first for another day!
Yet knowing how way leads on to way,
I doubted if I should ever come back.
I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I—
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.
And sorry I could not travel both
And be one traveler, long I stood
And looked down one as far as I could
To where it bent in the undergrowth;
Then took the other, as just as fair,
And having perhaps the better claim,
Because it was grassy and wanted wear;
Though as for that the passing there
Had worn them really about the same,
And both that morning equally lay
In leaves no step had trodden black.
Oh, I kept the first for another day!
Yet knowing how way leads on to way,
I doubted if I should ever come back.
I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I—
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.
Sometimes, taking the path less traveled is not necessarily voluntary. If you are blessed with a child on the spectrum, it is a given that you will take the road less traveled because the well traveled path has been given to someone else. What makes your journey into the spectrum different is when you choose to explore, love and nurture the road less traveled. It may not start out as your chosen comfort zone but, in time and with a go map-less attitude, you will be inspired, motivated, and you will become the trailblazer.
It is true that Autism, unlike some other diseases or disabilities, has no road map. There is no timeframe for skillset acquisition or a timeframe for any expectation for skills being acquired. There are no guarantees that you will meet any of the mile markers. In my son's day of diagnosis, all four times he was put through the rigors of the evaluation process, we were told very little. Yes, he needed speech therapy for his severe delay but, other than that, very little was said by doctors. All you could do is keep working and keep trying. And, although it can be a difficult road to travel without a map, it can also be a blessing and a blank canvas on which to paint your journey. NO guarantees and yet no road blocks either. It is actually a gift to not know what is around the next corner and be able to retain hope and wish and want for the very best. And, yes..it's true...not everyone gets “very best” but... what if you do? No road map means…keep working, keep striving, keep dreaming and expecting greatness.
And, most importantly, set that bar high.
Because the truth is, you never know with autism. That is the part the doctors often don't make clear. Autism is fluid and changing and nothing is in stone. It has been said with other disabilities that, if you know one, you know them all. But autism is NOT like that. If you know one autistic child...well...you know ONE autistic child. There are no generalities, no paths that are designated.
With autism, there is only a starting point. The path, at this point, is not well defined. It is a wild new frontier and with that comes responsibilities and frustrations. Will we all do everything right? Nope, we won't. But, if you follow your instincts, get involved, and know your child well, you will go in the right direction and your child will thrive.
Don't ever forget in this go-mapless journey, YOU are the expert on your child. I'll write about growing a backbone in my next post...because if you don't know it yet in this journey, you will soon learn that your backbone is just as important as your instincts :)....and ten times as effective in getting what you need for your child!
And, most importantly, set that bar high.
Because the truth is, you never know with autism. That is the part the doctors often don't make clear. Autism is fluid and changing and nothing is in stone. It has been said with other disabilities that, if you know one, you know them all. But autism is NOT like that. If you know one autistic child...well...you know ONE autistic child. There are no generalities, no paths that are designated.
With autism, there is only a starting point. The path, at this point, is not well defined. It is a wild new frontier and with that comes responsibilities and frustrations. Will we all do everything right? Nope, we won't. But, if you follow your instincts, get involved, and know your child well, you will go in the right direction and your child will thrive.
Don't ever forget in this go-mapless journey, YOU are the expert on your child. I'll write about growing a backbone in my next post...because if you don't know it yet in this journey, you will soon learn that your backbone is just as important as your instincts :)....and ten times as effective in getting what you need for your child!
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